When you have big dreams competing for your time and attention, a job becomes an afterthought and a temporary placeholder.
People won’t understand why you’re unavailable, why you say no, why you spend your lunch hours working on your ticket out of the rat race.
Some might start wondering why you’re not a “team player” anymore.
What they don’t know is your main chick is your side hustle. She’s your escape plan. Your secret lover.
She lets you run all the bad game you want on her. You can put her on a pedestal, worship the ground she walks on, and she will smile at your hard work and efforts.
She won’t leave you for all the failures. She’s there when you’re a nobody. And she’ll be there when you’re a success.
In a way, she’s the perfect girlfriend.
Your reward for sticking with her? Adding value and wisdom to the world, helping out others, meeting like-minded people, money — and a ticket out.
The more time you spend time with her, she also changes you. She tells you to seek out winners and avoid the losers. She turns you into a creator not a consumer. And she also makes you psychologically unemployable.
1) You begin to be repulsed by people who say, “Just living the dream.”
When people give up on their ambitions, they might look normal on the outside, but their subconscious language gives them away.
“Just living the dream” or its variation, “Just another day in paradise” is a phrase said by people who have no fire and no hope.
It’s a subconscious tell, and it’s language that reeks of defeatism.
Our brains are wired for repetition. What you repeat enough times, is what you will subconsciously manifest. Repeat a sad song. Feel sad. Repeat a inspiring song. Feel inspired. Repeat negativity. Feel negativity.
That’s why you will NEVER hear me say crap like that.
Some will say, “Oh they’re just joking.”
Notice the jokes and remarks only slant in one way and not the other.
No one ever says, “Just another day closer to paradise.”
Other honorable mentions:
“Is it Friday yet?”
“It feels like Monday.”
“I hate that 4 o’clock feeling.”
“Can’t wait for the weekend.”
A life of looking forward to 5 o’clock everyday, is not living a visionary life.
In the book Gorilla Mindset:
What you want is an amazing life free from anxiety. You want to feel good. To live an amazing life, you must first start by living an amazing day. Begin visualizing your perfect day in as much detail as you can.
If you imagine yourself living by the ocean, hear the sound of the waves and smell the salt water. Daydream, and as you do, recognize that you are getting closer to your dreams becoming reality. You must see what you want, to get what you want.
It’s a great book for aligning your habits with your vision of the future. A vision without daily conscious action, is just wishful thinking.
A positive vision of your future, beats a negative resistance to the present.
2) You begin slacking off at work and work on your side hustle.
Whenever I worked at a gym, between cleaning and spraying down gym equipment, I had lots of free time. Next to the lockers was a long walk in storage closet that kept, a washing machine, cleaning supplies, and other stuff. It was also a perfect place to hide.
I would be on phone, writing down ideas and reading blogs any chance I got. Then I would get home and get to work.
One day I got caught, and was told, “It’s against the rules to have your phone out during work. It’s to be put on silent and you supposed to be cleaning.”
Do you think this lady followed the rules herself? NO.
Remember if you get caught, it just means you just need to get better at hiding it. So I did.
3) You use your lunch breaks for some kind of self-improvement.
For my lunch break, I would scarf down something, and immediately go to the gym. Work out for 40 mins to an hour.
This gives me energy for the rest of the day. If i’m not going to the gym, then I’m writing for my blog or doing something to improve it.
When I tell people I work out twice a day they get a big surprised look on their face and ask, “Don’t you get tired?”
If anything I more hyped up.
When I first started going to the gym, I would get tired after workouts, but after some point the ‘tiredness’ converts into raw energy and workouts leave you feeling energized. Unless you stick with going to the gym you won’t experience this feeling.
4) You don’t smile much at work.
Why would you smile doing something you don’t like? Smiling only reinforces a bad illusion.
People who smile too much at work, are subconsciously reinforcing the idea they ‘do like’ this job they hate.
You’ve got to snap out of the illusion and not do anything to reinforce that illusion. That’s why I don’t pal or joke around. I do that crap outside of work because that’s where my happiness is — outside of a job !
5) You begin to wonder if people who slack off are like you and not just lazy.
Whenever I walk into any store or business, I pay attention to the slackers.
I know there are 2 types of people who slack: people like me who were reading blogs and writing down ideas, and people who are just lazy.
To anyone observing we would look the same. But if I were to talk to that slacker and they talk about some stuff they are working on outside of a job, then I immediately know. So don’t judge slackers.
My friend at work appeared to be a slacker at first. But he had two side businesses. He was always on the phone and always using his lunch break to set up equipment for clients.
6) You call in sick.
Sometimes you’ve got momentum and you need to take a day off to keep the fire going.
When other people call in sick, it’s because they want to escape work for a day.
When psychologically unemployable people call in sick it’s because they want to escape 9-5 work forever.
On days when I call in sick, I head to the library and get going on my writing. If it’s cold I write at home. Either way it’s time well spent.
7) You don’t say more than necessary.
If you’re in a meeting , then you just say your peace to keep appearances.
Meanwhile you’re on your phone writing down the next idea.
8) You’ll start turning down girls.
Again, when your main chick is your side-hustle, you will turn down girls.
You’ll just be hard to track down. You won’t respond to texts. Not only girls but friends as well.
It’s just the name of the game.
Long ago, I heard the advice, “fake it till you make it.”
Lots of guys fake being busy when they aren’t busy in the hopes girls will see them as ambitious and not some loser who just sits around playing video games.
Yeah, that works up until a certain point.
Nothing beats being real-deal busy. Nothing beats having real-deal ambitions.
9) You say ‘no’ more often.
When someone asks you to do something that will take a lot of time, you will say no. Saying no means spending more time on your ambition.
A lot of people get sucked into saying, “yes” because they want to be viewed as a team player, not the odd man out.
A subconscious tell for cognitive dissonance is when you hear people say, “It keeps me busy” or, “Oh, I don’t mind.”
Deep down inside no one wants to take on more work, so the brain cooks up an excuse to reduce the dissonance.
In the book, The Psychology of Judgement and Decision Making, there’s an experiment that shows people will lie to themselves rather than state the obvious.
In one experiment, a person is asked to do a boring and time-consuming task. After the boring task the person is asked to take over the experiment for $1.00 (or $20.00 depending on the condition).
All $1.00 and $20.00 subjects agreed to be hired, and after they told the waiting person how enjoyable the tasks were, they were asked, among other things, to evaluate the tasks. What Festinger and Carlsmith (1959) found was that subjects in the $1.00 condition rated the tasks as significantly more enjoyable than did subjects in the other two conditions.
Festinger and Carlsmith argued that subjects who were paid only $1.00 to lie to another person experienced “cognitive dissonance.”
Reading this book will open your eyes to all the ways your brain plays tricks on you.
Deep down inside nobody wants to take on more work than necessary, so to compensate the brain will hallucinate a reality where you’re convinced you liked that choice all along.
So the next time you hear, “Hey look on the bright side, at least 5 o’clock will get here faster”–you’re probably hearing someone who’s experiencing cognitive dissonance.
Fast forward to enough Fridays, and enough 5 o’clocks and hey, you get to retire and finally start living life.
All it took was years of saying “yes” and your soul.
Many jobs require you to ‘look busy’ and to play a role.
Even if you have a busy job that requires you to always be ‘on’ there is always a way. I don’t know how I discovered it, but there are these lawn mowing YouTube channels. They’ve got there own landscaping community with beefs, drama, and advice on making money.
I watched these videos because I’m always curious how people make money on their own.
Buy anyway…It’s been years since I’ve tuned in, but one video always stuck with me even today.
This guy owned his own landscaping business and was always out on the job cutting limbs, landscaping, and just doing hard work and he still managed to devour 6 – 10 books a month.
He used these Bluetooth wireless headsets to take calls and listen to audio books while on the job and even when he went to sleep. You can check out his YouTube video on it.
After seeing him actually use them in his videos, I’ve got to say, that there is just simply no excuse for not leveling up your mind while on the job.
10) You give short answers.
You wish for people to stop using filler sentences, “Hey um, I know this is kinda short notice, but well, you see uh the thing is, I was standing around thinking, we could use help on that thing we talked about the other week, but I don’t know if its good or bad, but hey…”
The time it took to get to the point I could have written a short email and replied, “OK.”
11) You don’t feel guilty for not being a “team player.”
Because when you lose your job, no ones on your team. You’re on your own.
Instead work on building connections outside of work.
Build a real team of people who want to bust ass and kick ass all day on their dreams.
And that’s all she wrote. Eleven signs you’re becoming psychologically unemployable.
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